I smugly watched all my neighbours this morning scraping ice from the windows of their cars. They all had their motors running, exhaust polluting the atmosphere, while they scraped. And scraped. And scraped.

All of them, to a person, have a garage. And where do they park? On the fucking road, two wheels on the pavement as is standard nowadays, causing an obstruction both on the pavement so that mothers with pushchairs have to step into the road to get around the vehicle, and to road users who have to skilfully weave in and out of the cars parked on either side of the road.

Meanwhile their garages remain full of cardboard boxes and carrier bags full of crap that they will never use but they’re either too lazy or stingy to get rid of it. So they park on the pavement. Brilliant!

So, as I watched them scrapety-scraping their screens, I lifted my garage door, got into my warm car and drove straight off. Moral of the tale? – Use your garage for what it was fucking built for. Tossers!

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